The Clothers...

Every one of these rocks is here for a reason

Our house was previously owned by a rock hound, and the family had lived here 55 years. When we moved in, the back yard had rocks everywhere, spread out, sorted, cut in half...

Now, after cleaning up, I have a rock pile. I was going to bury it at first. Cynthia suggested we throw them in the dumpster. But these words, uttered by the old owner's daughter, echo in my head: "Every one of these rocks is here for a reason. They are something."

And with that thought, I can't help but preserve them in some way, shape, or form. 

Maybe I can get some rock hounds to take them, use them, value them. Maybe I can cut them open and make a patio or fountain that displays their glory. Just not sure yet.

Now, take a look at the world around us. People of all different colors, shapes, and sizes. Some piled up, others spread out. And everyone here for a reason. They are someone. Created in the image of God, each one is valuable.

What are you doing today honor your value? The value of others around you?

 

 

 

 

 

Living at Peace in an Imperfect World

As I sit in the sun room of our 100 year old house, and look at the various projects around me, I am at peace. My house is old, my cars are old, my bike is old, I'm getting old. Things are running down in the natural entropy of this earth. 

As humans, we spend a bulk of our time trying to bring order to things. Think about it, really.

We prepare, build, clean, and fix things all our lives. And there are always things that could use our attention to be back to the way they were when first created. We could go crazy trying to keep everything in order and in their orginal intended state.

Our car has it share of dings and scratches from years of use. I recently noticed a new scrape on the front bumper. I laughed and acknowledged if this car were new, this would be a big deal. Instead, it's one more battle wound of a well used tool.

Yikes, think about the first scratch, ding, etc. in anything that is new to us. It's usually upsetting. It's no longer perfect! And I realized the sense of freedom I have in my old stuff. My expectations are so much more focused on things other than stuff and trying to make it or keep it perfect.

As Cynthia and I restore our old house, we're not trying to make it perfect. It's an old house, and it's dings, scrapes, and squeaks are a testament to a long and full life. Instead it will gradually be restored to it's original intent, including some of the bumps and bruises that give it character.

Think of the life parallels. We were originally created in God's image, sinless and in relationship with Him. We got sucked away from God into the allure of having our own stuff in a world where things run down. And here we are. Chasing after perfection in a world that is continually falling apart.

Jesus came to refocus us, to offer us spiritual restoration. Not perfection on this earth, but a restored relationship to our Father. Bumps, bruises, and all. 

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." Mt 6:19-21

I don't need nobody...

Clint's face captivates me. He is living on the streets, one of countless people we offer help to. He needs a family, and may not even want one. We offer the gospel and the family of God.

Our church gathering was talking about people getting acid thrown in their face and their lips cut off for proclaiming the gospel in Uganda under Idi Amin. The conversation shifted to the conditions here in the States and what challenges we might face in sharing the gospel.

This topic always winds me up. We have so much freedom here, and even when some think the "evil homosexuals," "baby killers" and others are trying to take over, we still get to proclaim the gospel without getting our lips cut off.

What I think we struggle within our western culture is being interdependent, the way of God's design for His church. The way we can truly show God's love to one another is through relationship; and that's not just a coffee date, but doing life together. Counting on each other for how we live.

Our culture does a good job of teaching us success is independence; self sufficiency. The Bible teaches the opposite, that we should depend on God and each other.

Our churches and seminaries tend to teach people how to be spiritual adults, focusing on our personal development. The Bible teaches that we should be spiritual parents that are pouring ourselves into the development of others.

Often times our church goers are embroiled in debating accurate theology amongst each other, and then driving back home, hitting the garage door opener, and disappearing into their single family home, where they may not even know their neighbors. That's success in America. Independence.

The Gospel would literally go viral if we lived interdependently in our neighborhoods and loved people outside of the church, and they in turn loved others. The Holy Spirit is that powerful. And guess what? Society's evils would be over-run by God's love, and everyone would have a family.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Relentless Leadership

My wife blew me away last Friday night at the LAX airport.

We arrived with plenty of time for our flight to Spokane through Denver, only to find ourselves waiting at the gate for our plane to be repaired.

As minutes of delay moved towards hours, Cynthia announced "we're never going to make our connecting flight..." and off she went, while I worked away on my laptop.

I looked up 30 minutes later to see her leaning over the counter working over our flight options with one of the employees. She came over to me and announced "We're going to Seattle, and heading to Spokane in the morning" and back up to the counter she went. I went back to work and 30 minutes later I looked up and there she is still at the counter. "We've missed that flight" she announces. I go back to work.

Finally she comes back and announces "We're flying to Portland for the night, and Spokane in the morning. The flight leaves in 35 minutes."

At this point we've been at the airport for four and a half hours. Off we run towards our new gate. I ask "So where is it?" and Cynthia responds "I don't know. It's in terminal 3." Yikes, we're in terminal six. "Where are we staying tonight?" I asked. "My sister's. She's picking us up at 11:30 and dropping us back off at 5:30..." "Holy smokes, you asked her to do that?!" And we kept running.

At the side walk we're told it will take 20 minutes to get to the other terminal, unless we cut through the parking garage. Off we run, first into a parking lot that's fenced on the other side, back out, down the street, across the parking garage, and to terminal 2. We ran down the side walk a couple hundred yards, me chasing after her, into a sea of High Schoolers in line waiting for security.

Cynthia asked the guard if we could go first and learned we didn't have real boarding passes. I was ready to give up, but not Cynthia. Over to the ticket counter we go. We asked if we could be pushed to the front of the security line and are told "Nope, you have to wait in line." I'm ready to give up again. Cynthia was not.

So back to security we went. Before us were about 200 high schoolers in a line zig-zagging back and forth in front of security. I said "there's no way, let's go get a hotel" but off Cynthia went, nudging the crowded line to the right, dragging her blue suitcase behind her. "Excuse me, my flights about to leave, excuse me!" with me behind her "I'm with the lady with the blue suit case."

At the gate, we learned we were not in the system (even computers aren't that fast), and I thought all was lost. With another push from Cynthia, the flight attendant had us seats, and we were on the plane just in time. I sat down with a couple of strangers with my head still spinning and told my story... Crazy.

At Cynthia's sister's house, we enjoyed a late night glass of wine and a few snacks and laughed about the evening. And after a few hours of sleep, we were back at the airport headed for an 8AM arrival in Spokane. My wife was relentless. My brother's memorial service was at noon, and we were there with plenty of time to spare and a story to tell.

What are you relentless about?

Skid Row

My friend and coworker, April, took me on a tour of Skid Row in LA yesterday. She has done a lot of ministry on the streets and knew her way around like she lives on them (she doesn't).

We toured PATH (People Assisting The Homeless) in Hollywood, and then Union Rescue Mission and the Weingart Center on Skid Row.

Between them they house 1500 or so people (and these are only three of many services), helping folks get a new start with social work, and in the Rescue Mission's case, Biblical discipleship. The homeless population in LA is estimated at 51,000 on a given night.

Skid Row is not quite as daunting as I imagined, but I've also gotten more used to hanging out with the homeless. We strolled down various streets amongst the population, drawing no attention in some cases, and a few comments in others. One person suggested I was a touring "philanthropist" and another asked April if that was her real hair color (red). I overheard a couple of guys combining their resources, one saying "OK, we've got twenty three cents..."

In LA they have made it legal to sleep on the streets, and illegal to remove someone's stuff from the sidewalk; both respecting and also perpetuating the look and feel of an area with a concentration of nearly 5000 that simply live on the streets here.

At the end of the day, I had met people serving the homeless who believe help hinges on case management and social work, others who believe the real hope lies in a relationship to God, and me concluding it's a little of both. People must want change and have hope that it can happen. Social work can only get you so far. Real change comes from the transforming power of God in our lives.

I like the expression that people don't care how much you know until they know how much you care. I enjoy being in a ministry where the first step is caring; meeting people where they are at, then offering hope and a framework for life change built on Jesus.

I love the Lord's Prayer... here's an excerpt: "Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven." It's our job to bring God's kingdom to earth. And guess what? There's no skid row in His kingdom. Everyone is loved and cared for.

Here's to giving everyone we meet a taste of God's kingdom through loving care and compassion.

Empty Nesters once again

Friday we took our kids and grandkids to the airport. They are off to their next chapter of life in Pennsylvania, after living as a three generation household with us this last year in Oxnard.

They are now living at Camphill Soltane again, outside of Philadelphia. This intentional community is formed around the care and education of learning disabled young adults.

Soltane has fond memories for us. Chris and Cate served there for three years, Finley was born there, and many of our vacations were spent there.

After finishing up some more education, and some soul searching, Chris and Cate have re-engaged this community and will raise their family at Soltane for the foreseeable future.

So, our big ol' Oxnard house is kind of quiet. Our next chapter here in the Magnolia House looks like lots of remodeling, lots of guests, and lots of trips to Pennsylvania!

Here's an aerial view of Camphill Soltane, and where the kids are right now:

With lots of room to roam, and a community with shared values, the family will do great. We're excited to visit there once again, probably this August after Cate has grandchild number three!

We hear Simon was not quite sure what to do about the cold weather, and that Finley had already been out helping tap maple trees to make maple syrup...

Can't wait to see them all again!

 

So Much the Same, yet So Different

I was talking to a friend this week who just lost his brother unexpectedly in a climbing accident. With the loss of one of my brothers and that journey fresh in my head, and I was able to share a few thoughts, next steps, and simply pray.

Later, texting back and forth with my other brother, I shared this story and he said "Losing family sucks. Seems like it is more common. Like when you get a car and its like everybody has one."

So true. And while each of our lives are so much the same, they are also as different as falling snow flakes. And while each of us are so different, we are all the same, designed by God to experience His love, and share His love.

While we're grieving it is perhaps when it's most clear that we are designed to love, in the image of God who is love. Our emotions remind us that this person was important to us. We loved them.

These are times when God can most notably reveal himself with a peace that passes understanding.

Phillipians 4...

⁶ Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. ⁷ And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

 ⁸ Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

This is easier said than done. Losing a loved one is hard, and God designed us to grieve.

Try this...

Imagine our lives without having known those we've lost at all.

Celebrate all that is excellent and praiseworthy about having been blessed to have them in our life, if only for a time.

Grieve a life lost, celebrate a life given.

Everybody dies. But those close to us aren't everybody, they are somebody.

To my friend, I'm deeply saddened your brother has been pulled away so early and so suddenly. And I'm very happy you were blessed to have had him in your life, if even just for a season.

To some he was part of a passing snow storm, to you, he was a beautiful snow flake.

That is excellent and praiseworthy. 

Traveling at the Speed of Light

Wow, a year ago this week I was fresh in California. The year has flown by.

At this time last year I was starting a new job, living in one of our rescue missions and waiting for Cynthia's arrival six weeks later.

I was gobbling up our new ministry; our new community.

With everything new, we bought a 100 year old house, and took on a major home remodel.

We've had about 10 very welcome visits from family and friends, and made new friends.

Our daughter got married, our son and family moved down to live with us, his appendix burst without insurance, and the hospital forgave the $60,000 bill.

We've met a lot of great people from our community and local churches and are involved in a church plant.

A dear friend died unexpectedly in the fall, and my brother took his own life at Christmas.

And a new friend asked me "You've had a lot happen this year. That's unusual, isn't?" "YES!" I responded.

As crazy as this year has been, I've learned better than ever to rely on God. Proverbs 3:5-6 has come alive as has the basic principle of trusting God in His calling.

"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight."

As crazy as the year has been, in the middle of it all, our path has been straight. God is faithful. We are blessed.

Every time I've felt overwhelmed by circumstances, I remember that God called us to where we are, what we are doing, who we are in contact with. He is in control, He is accomplishing what He intended through us as we release ourselves to His outcomes, not our own.

We would like to slow down just a little and take in some more of the scenery. That seems like a good goal for 2012.

 

Processing life and death

This morning our good friend Connie messaged me to see how I was doing at processing my brother's death.

I responded that having the opportunity to stand over the bloody spot in the shop where he shot himself; writing his memorial service; writing recent blogs has helped me process his death.

But I haven't processed his life yet. That will take much longer.

Spending time with the family and walking around in the house where he walked, meeting his co-workers and friends, being in his spaces has provided the opportunity for me to just begin processing his life. That's where the real grieving process begins.

I helped others begin the process of grief yesterday at Scott's memorial service, and today, during the six hour drive to Portland, my mind will begin flashing back to all that Scott has meant to me through the years. And all of Scott that lives on through me.

Each of Scott's family and friends are on a journey of reflection, of empty anticipation, of reforming who we each are without Scott here, recognizing how much of who we are is Scott still here in us.

I shared with the family that our lives are like a jigsaw puzzle with all these pieces that define who we are. And who we are is defined a lot by who we love and are in relationship with. When someone important is taken away, pieces of our puzzle are forever gone.

When we lose someone, we basically have an identity crisis. Who am I now? And we need to figure out who we are with the pieces that are left and any new pieces to be added. It takes a while to rearrange all those pieces into a new identity.

As we find our identity increasingly in our creator, it looks more and more like this:

Romans 8:35-39 - Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written: "For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered." No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.

For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Who are you? Who have you been? Who are you becoming?

Who is a part of your puzzle? Take time to let them know.

We all make mistakes...

Today I'm presiding over my own brother's memorial service.

It sounds crazy from a lot of perspectives, but it's important to his wife, and powerful for me to gather my thoughts, feelings, and grieve through the process of writing the service.

The recurring themes in the many discussions we've had over the last few days is how senseless Scott's death is, and what a mistake it was.

We are confident Scott did not wake up in the morning and say to himself "Hey, today I'm going to make everyone I know miserable. And to top it off, right at Christmas, so they'll never forget this horrible act."

Rather, in a moment of  despair, he lost all context and made perhaps one of the biggest mistakes we can ever make, believing we don't matter.

Scott's son Sean says Scott had a demon of some sort. And he's right. We all have our demons of doubting God, doubting ourselves, doubting the love of those around us, doubting the impact we have on those around us, doubting things are as good as they are or the hope they can be better. Doubts.

What a blessing it is to have confidence not in ourselves, but in our creator.

1 John 5:13-15 "I write these things to you who believe in the name of the Son of God so that you may know that you have eternal life. This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of him."

People matter to God. That's the whole story of the Bible.

People matter to God. It's where we get our confidence.

People matter to God. It's why God sent His son.

People matter to God. God matters to people.

Don't make the mistake.

It matters.